Leigh Hurst, FYB Founder
About the Boobies Basics Series: This is the second of six short articles that focus on common misconceptions about breast cancer. These misconceptions are based on the most frequent questions I get when I go out and speak to groups of women.
Like Mother, Like Daughter?
The relationship between mother and daughter is interesting to say the least. In some cases it’s like a built-in best friend, especially for those of us without sisters. In other cases it may seem more like your arch enemy. And in most cases, the relationship likely spends some time in both camps and can switch from one camp to the other without warning. My mother deserves an award for surviving the many undeserved “camp switcheroos” I’ve subjected her to.
I love my mother and have been lucky enough to have 37 years to see the world through her eyes. There are many of her personality traits I can only hope have been handed down somehow through a combination of genetics and nurturing. My mother is patient and compassionate in a way that deserves to be recognized in the Guiness Book of World Records. She (and my dad) somehow provided guidance without dictating direction and allowed me to have enough slack to hang myself here and there. And, by far, her gift to the world is her ability to be a listener who never tires of hearing my “issue du jour”. Well, I’m guessing she does tire of it but would never let me know that. That is the true gift, I suppose.
Then, of course, there are all of the “negative” personality traits we love to blame on our mothers…ones that have seeped into us through osmosis (not fair!). For example, my love of salty snacks like potato chips is one trait I’d like to give back to my mom – thanks a lot mom! And how about losing the car keys, or leaving the house without the checkbook or running out of gas in some remote area because I can’t seem to notice the fuel light on the dash? These are certainly learned behaviors from my mother and I know that because my dad says “You’re just like your mother!” It must be true.
The one thing I did not inherit from my mother is breast cancer. Upon being diagnosed I thought “Breast cancer doesn’t run in my family, how is this possible?” I quickly learned that 90-95% of women who get breast cancer have no family history of the disease. I share this statistic with groups when I speak all of the time, and it’s by far the most shocking information to them. While it’s true that your risk for getting breast cancer does increase if your mother, sister, or daughter is diagnosed, the vast majority of breast cancer cases are not due to family history.
So the bad news is, all women need to be concerned about getting breast cancer. You should not have a false sense of safety just because no one in your family has the disease. The good news is, there’s one less thing we can point the finger at our mothers for. They deserve some slack anyway so why not just thank them for all of the things they HAVE given you.
